The Vulnerability and Wisdom of The Vagina

yoni image for blog library The Vulnerability and Wisdom of The VaginaAs I begin this post, I can feel that it will be raw, visceral and deep. So grab your beverage of choice and sit with me in a place of no distraction.  This topic is important, for both women and men.

The primary focus of my work, as many of you know, is teaching women the powerful and unique language of their bodies as a path for transformation.  Women’s bodies speak a particular language, via our reproductive experiences; namely the menstrual cycle, pregnancy and menopause, and also via our sexuality.

After a recent conversation with a woman about her sexuality and these body messages, I began to think about the vagina (often I will refer to as yoni) and its profound wisdom and vulnerability in our lives.  There are a range of experiences women have which involve this portal, both literally and spiritually.  In the normal spectrum,  there is giving birth, to our monthly cycles, to sex, to the undesirable experiences of rape and sexual violence in all forms, as well as female genital mutilation.  Our vaginas are messengers and teachers, yet many women have shame, fear, ignorance, and numbness, to name just a few, around this area of their bodies.

Vulnerability is defined most simply as capable of being physically or emotionally wounded or hurt.  For most men, and many women, the word vulnerability provokes discomfort.  Why would anyone want to be vulnerable?  Because without vulnerability, we are closed.  When we are closed, we cannot receive love and the many other blessings which are possible within the range of our human experience.  The key is to be vulnerable and to have discernment.  This is a gift of the vagina.  Whether women realize it or not, your vagina speaks to you via body messages even when you are not tuned in to your truths.  It is a vulnerable space and yet it is capable of stretching to birth a child.  It has a profound physical resilience.  Its vulnerability lies in its connection to our hearts.  Its discernment is mind-blowingly clear through the messages it delivers to a woman’s body as feedback.

In teachings on tantra and other sacred texts, there is a known connection and polarity between a woman’s heart and her vagina/yoni, and a man’s heart and his penis.  In a woman, the positive pole is her heart/breasts and the negative is the vagina.  In a man, his heart is the negative pole and his penis is the positive.  When a man and a woman embrace in a normal hug and/or sexually, these poles are activated in the same way that battery cables work.  For women, the vulnerability of our hearts is tied to our vaginas.  Any woman knows, and men should, that when a woman opens her heart, her legs are powerless to remain closed.  When a woman surrenders her heart, her sexuality comes alive.  And this is where the vulnerability of the vagina begins.  In entering a woman sexually, her heart is also entered, even if she feels closed, as in casual sex.

Many women today are engaging in sex without an awareness of this aspect of themselves.  But the vagina knows, even if you are completely oblivious.  When a woman allows a man to fuck her without a heart connection, or respect at a minimum, penetration becomes denigration.   A woman KNOWS when his has happened because she feels used, empty, sad, depressed.    There are many, many shades and flavors to sexuality.  When the vagina is accessed without connection, women suffer on various levels.  And your body WILL tell you when a man has no business being inside you.  And this doesn’t apply just to casual sex, but also to any relationship or marriage.  We all choose unwisely at times in our lives, myself included.  But your vagina invariably knows the truth.

How?  For starters, immediately after being with a man, if it’s a situation where you’ve been used, or a relationship that has never honored you, you just feel empty.  Many, many women know this place as not wanting to have sex, but doing it anyway.    Some women may be unaware of this emptiness if it’s been the way you’ve done sex your whole life or for a protracted period of time, but there is an emptiness, and often there are tears, if not immediately in his presence, later when you are alone.  When you’ve chosen wisely, you feel CONNECTED, more connected to that man after being penetrated by him.  And penetration by him is beyond his penis.  When a man truly penetrates a woman, the WHOLE woman and not just the hole of a woman, he finds his own heart and all of the polarities come alive.  There is vulnerability and trust.  A woman may cry after this kind of sex as well, but the tears will be very different because they will be from a place of being embraced rather than used,  a place of connection rather than disconnection, a place that reached into her heart – and his.

I’ve worked with women who were sleeping with men that they knew were wrong for them, yet they continued to have sex with them.  Often, your body will create physical dis-ease as a message to you about your choice.  I cannot tell you how many times I’ve encountered this phenomenon in my work with women.  I remember one client would get a yeast infection every time after sleeping with this man she was attached to.  Her vagina’s wisdom was literally speaking to her, telling her this man was wrong for her.   I’ve seen women get bladder infections as well after sexual encounters with men who were bad choices for them.  Cervical issues as well are often body wisdom messengers speaking to a woman about how she is not honoring herself. Many women will have an intensification of menstrual pain, if they are prone to it normally, and women who normally don’t experience PMS will while in a relationship, sexual or otherwise, that does not honor them.  Ladies, you KNOW.   You may be choosing to ignore that you know, but in that deepest part of you,  there is wisdom.

Someone shared with me recently that they read an article saying that it’s impossible to have a vaginal orgasm, that there’s no such thing.  That’s utterly ridiculous.  When a woman’s body is shut down emotionally or indulging in fast food sex, which is the cultural norm, there is a lack of vulnerabilty IN HER HEART.    Remember the vagina and heart are connected.  If your heart is closed and you have sex with someone without connection, orgasm is not possible vaginally for most women.  Vaginal orgasms are the deepest, most profound form of orgasm.  Many women are getting off on jackhammer vibrators, using only clitoral stimulation, which only promotes more desensitization, resulting in more of an inability to feel the subtleties within the vagina.  It’s aggressive,  surface stimulation, and I know that many men feel with penetration they can’t compete with those quickie surface orgasms.      It  deprives them of an ability to become great lovers if women seem to only want to get off clitorally.   Deep, vulnerable, heart and soul-stirring orgasms come with a willingness to choose openness of your heart and the wisdom to discern whether you should open your legs to this man.  That is why women are finding it difficult to have vaginal orgasms, not because they don’t exist, but because our relationship to our vaginas and our hearts is so fragile.

When a woman allows a man to f.u.c.k. (my definition: f.ree u.nrestrained c.onnection to k.undalini) her from a place of heart connection, both can let their freak flags fly.  All those shades of our sexuality, when done from a place of real connection and trust, can be incredible to experience, and promote the deepest of intimacy.  But when we allow men into this vulnerable place, using that definition of vulnerable I mentioned earlier, our bodies know immediately if we can trust him.  If a woman is tuned in to herself and the subtle energies that we have access to through our vaginas, that knowing is unmistakable.  If you are tuned in to your body in general, you know before you ever get to the point of penetration.  But we often ignore that voice that tells us not to go there.  And then when we do, it’s like we have broken our own hearts.  If we can’t say the word vagina, if we can’t look at it, touch it and have pleasure through it, then we are disconnected from its wisdom consciously, but it will speak to you via the body messages I’ve mentioned above, and more.  Even if you don’t physical issues related to your vagina,  depression will often be the messenger.

There is another layer of vulnerability to the vaginas of women who have been victims of sexual abuse or rape.  In my work with women in this area, I see that women cope with this painful violation — which is of the soul, and not just the body — in different ways.  Some avoid sex.  Some indulge in lots of disconnected sex.  Some eat their unprocessed feelings, and put on weight as a way of protecting themselves, with the idea that if they are overweight, they won’t become victims of sexual violation again.  These are but a few shades, as each woman deals with this trauma in different ways.  Even for those that go through some form of healing, their vulnerability in this area is even greater than women who have not suffered this abuse.  Men need to understand this, and women need to honor this piece if it is part of their life’s truth.  I don’t think that men truly understand what it means to be penetrated.  To have a man enter into this vulnerable place.  The only analogy I could possibly offer is for a straight man to experience anal penetration.  For most straight men, it provokes vulnerability.  Here we are in a society where we are barely able to look each other in the eyes, to penetrate each other in our gaze.  Yet often women allow themselves to be penetrated vaginally without an awareness of the sacredness of their bodies.  When was the last time you were with a man sexually and you were able to hold each other’s gaze?  Do you allow him to penetrate you without being seen?  The eyes are the window to your soul.  If you’re unwilling to allow access to being penetrated through your eyes, how can you possibly allow vaginal penetration.  It’s an act of disrespect.  And men, how can you not see the woman, the human being, the soul that you desire?  How can you fuck a woman without caring who she is?  Women, if you value yourself more, you wouldn’t find yourself with a man who would do this to you, and if you did, you’d walk away.  The more you learn to honor what you carry between your legs, the more you will understand its connection to your heart.  The more you honor your heart, the more you will be unable to allow sexual penetration of this vulnerable, sacred space.

Couples who have love and trust can explore 50 shades of gray, and every other color under the sun.  Sexual exploration is vital to our understanding of who we are, but for a woman, opening to allow those experiences with a man who doesn’t value her, honor her, will make her feel used, violated.   Without intimacy and trust between two people, we are violating ourselves repeatedly.  I believe that the kind of sexual experiences people are longing to have can only happen in a SATISFYING way if the people involved have that heart connection, that trust, that intimacy.  Women, you know.  And you must listen in order to take care of your own heart.

In our culture today, so many men are using women’s bodies as receptacles for their pleasure, dismissing and discarding the heart and soul of women.  And many believe that women are okay with it.  Many women falsely believe they have to comply with “men’s needs” in order to have a man, so they make themselves okay with it.  I’m offering a different perspective.  Men reading this, I ask you to dig deep within you and try to imagine the vulnerabilty of penetration for a woman, and the pain and hurt you can cause by just not giving a damn about her, using her only to get off on.   Even if you think she’s okay with it, even if she says she is, many women are so wounded and blocked here, from so much pain, that they are numb.  The harm you do by using a woman at any time is beyond my ability to convey to you with words.  I am not asking you to read a woman’s mind.  I am simply asking you to examine your motives.  If you know you’re only using her for sex, perhaps you could make a different choice.    You know what your intention is.  Be mindful of that.  Find a place inside you that honors women, our bodies, our hearts, and that vulnerable portable you are all so fond of inhabiting.  It’s not yours to take ownership of or to use as you wish.  Women, you MUST stop allowing this to happen.  We have the power through honoring ourselves to put an end to this.  We have the power to educate men with love and grace by simply standing in our own self-love and self-respect.  We don’t have to make men wrong in order to change this.   I also believe that when women honor men and stop vilifying them, men in turn will honor women.  When we understand this simple truth, our relationship to each other will be transformed, and we will learn to truly serve each other.


With love & blessings,



 ARE YOU SETTLING IN YOUR LIFE, EVEN ON THE SMALL STUFF?There’s a tenet which says, “The way you do anything is the way you do everything.”  I was reflecting on the notion of where am I settling in my life and it occurred to me that if I settle even on the small things, well, that contributes to my settling on the big ones. I’ll share a recent example.

My dad gave me a cool case for my iPhone 4s for Christmas, but when it arrived, it wasn’t the one that I had asked for, nor was it the one that he ordered.  In other words, a glitch at the Apple store.  Rather than the red one, they sent me an orange one.  Now orange is one of my very favorite colors, but I wanted the red one.  I thought, maybe I would just keep it, no big deal.  But this voice inside me said loudly and clearly, “But you really liked the red one.  Why don’t you exchange it.”  Makes sense, but then I realized it would take EFFORT to make that exchange happen.  I called the Apple Store to see if they had a red one and they said they did, but when I made the EFFORT to drive to the Apple Store to exchange it, it was a different style and not the one I wanted.  So once again, I could have chosen a different one from the stock they had in the store, but I was really feeling how much I wanted what I wanted and didn’t want to settle.  And it became like a mantra in my head, “don’t settle for less than what you truly want.”  At this point it wasn’t about the case, but about living true to myself, as if this experience was a spiritual teaching in and of itself.  (And it was!)  So ultimately they refunded the money in the form of a gift card, and I then went home and made the further EFFORT to reorder it from the online store, and then I had to wait for it to arrive.

So what’s the theme here, really, is it getting what we TRULY want?  On the material level, yes, but it’s the journey that it represents through the EFFORT and some waiting that is the wisdom.  Most of us would rather settle for instant gratification, or to take whatever lands in our lap, even after we have made some EFFORT to get what we truly want.  But when you silence the voice of clarity within you, you begin to live a life of mediocrity, and you will settle all over the place.  In the job you choose to take, the relationship you choose to be in, what you wear, eat and think.  Because it’s true, the way you do anything is the way you do everything.

So why do we do this?  I’m finding that the questions are more important than the answers in life, and the questions will lead you on a journey of self-discovery.  Every time we say, “it’s too much trouble (AKA EFFORT!), I’ll just…” we are setting up a life that is less than what we truly envision for ourselves.  Over time, all that settling morphs into an entirely different life than the one we set out to acquire initially. Every time we say it’s okay when it’s not, we are in the process of changing the frequency of our ENTIRE life.

Now, I”m not talking about compromise here.  All relationships are give and take, and sometimes we need to compromise with another, but I”m inviting you not to compromise with YOURSELF.  Hold out for what you want.  You are worth it.  As I move through my own life, these subtle moments become epiphanies.  No, it’s not about me wanting the red one and not the orange case.  It’s about having what I truly want and being  willing to make the EFFORT to get it. It’s about staying on course with my vision for myself, for my life.  There’s an honesty and integrity in that.  Settling is a form of self-betrayal.  If you’ll betray yourself, you’ll allow others to do it, too.  It’s all connected.

So look at how you do things in your life.  I’m only exploring the aspect of settling in this post, and using a seemingly irrelevant situation as the example, but you can look at other aspects of your life.  For instance,  are you aggressive or passive about how you take action in your life?  Are you conservative or a risk-taker?  Are you a leader of a follower?  Do you like coffee or tea (Okay that was a joke)?   If you start to ask these questions and to examine all the little moments in your life and how you do them, you’ll discover a pattern that is consistent  throughout.  Know thyself.  The relationship you have with yourself is the most important one you’ll ever have.  I mean, you can’t get a divorce from yourself, or move away from yourself,  or ignore yourself.  So you’re stuck with you.  Be the YOU that’s true.  You’re worth the EFFORT.  So don’t settle for less!

Love & Blessings,


P,S. check out the archive posts and please share them on your social media and with anyone you feel would enjoy them!

Gina Cloud’s Segment of The Ricki Lake Show

Many of you asked me how you could see my appearance on The Ricki Lake Show, as you had missed it live.  I finally have access to the footage.  Click Here To Watch.

By the way, you won’t be able to view this on an iPhone or iPad for some reason I don’t understand.

Love & Blessings,



Ok, so this is a LONG one.  You may want to sit down with a cup of tea or coffee, or maybe a glass of wine or, my favorite, a shot of top-shelf tequila.  Ready?

How often, ladies,  do you end up looking at the man that you are in a relationship with or married to and thinking that you wish he could be a certain way, or that he would do something that you’ve always longed for him to do or the big one,  things he used to do?   I was reflecting on something in a conversation I was having with a friend of mine about the reality that as women, in our current modern world, we have a tendency at the beginning of our relationship to try to lead the man that we are getting involved with and who we are attracted to in the direction that we want to go.  It feels natural, because we all want  what we want, especially in relationship,  but this is our fatal mistake.  Because you can lead a horse to water, but as the adage goes,  you can’t make him drink.

Now when he is very thirsty, he will drink. Using that as a metaphor for early on in relationship where men are inclined to give us what we want in order for them to bed us.   This is true, ladies, even of men who care about us or love us or who will love us.  That’s BIG motivation for them to deliver all the goods we want.  So let me give you some examples of what I’m speaking to so that I can make what’s clear in my mind, clear to you as well.

Let’s say early on in a relationship, we want the man in our life to know that we love to be spoiled.   Now that means different things to different women, but let’s just say for the sake of this piece( and for simplicity’s sake) that we want our guy to know that we love to be taken out to dinner three or four times a week, (ok, so it’s a shallow example but that’s the way it’s coming through!)  and we want to be able to spend a certain amount of time together each week.    But when we start booking the reservations for the restaurant, or saying to him, “why don’t we go out to dinner tonight,”  rather than allowing him to suggest what he would like to do, we just go ahead and take charge and make it happen. and this is leading the horse to water, or in this case to the restaurant table.   So in those early stages you end up thinking all this is so romantic and he takes me out to dinner. But the reality is you set it up.
For the sake of keeping this simple and illustrating the point, if you want someone who wants to go out to dinner three times a week and you are with the man who never suggests taking you out to dinner, and when I say never suggests,  I’m speaking to that brand-new place in relationship where people really reveal who they are. Let’s say he suggests hey, let’s go for a picnic out in the woods. Not your flavor? A lot of women would say yes anyway, because they like this guy and they want him to like her, so what we are basically doing is setting up our new relationship lies and facades.  You’ll go for a picnic in the woods and hate every bit of it because you don’t like bugs or sitting on the ground, and he will go out to dinner with you even though restaurants aren’t his thing. As time goes on, you will continue the farce,  but most guys won’t.  Sorry ladies, but this is one of those places where I have to give it to men for being  more simple and honest. And it’s not that we are being dishonest consciously, it’s that there is a subtle form of manipulation going on when we keep trying to get him to do what we want.  And it’s born of a fear that either we will never have what we want, or that we don’t deserve to have what we want, or a combination of these feelings.  Or perhaps you just don’t want to end up alone, so you settle for what comes along.
What to do? In those early days, if you are clear about  what is important to you in relationship, you must adopt the feminine principle of BEING  and leave the masculine one of DOING to him. Witness how he shows up organically, because this is who he really is. Is he a guy that brings you flowers and takes you out to dinner and fancy places if that’s who you are? Or is he the kind of guy that wants to sit and talk for hours and know who you are from the inside out? You won’t find this out if you continue to lead with your doing. You’re trying to get what you want and need from a relationship which you are absolutely entitled to have, but you can’t get it by trying to change the man who is in front of you.  When we do this, we dishonor ourselves and the man before us.
Are you following me on this? Why do we do this? I believe because inherent in most women is a sense or belief that if we are just being who we are, that won’t be enough to be offered the things that we genuinely want to be offered by a man in a relationship, so we work at it. We set up our own romantic scenarios and all the other ones that are important to us. But here’s the thing, is it because we’re afraid of being alone? If we just were truly who we were and allowed the man that is the object of our interest to just be who he is and we both were to witness how we each show up for the other we would very early on know the truth of whether we will be a good fit in relationship. Instead we create a habit of getting what we want by taking the masculine role and then one day we realize “he never does XYZ if I don’t initiate.”   You’re right, because it’s not in his nature and  you probably should never have been with him if this is one of the things on your list of needs in a relationship. And then when you get angry, your guy is scratching his head because he genuinely, honestly doesn’t understand.  You see, ladies,  the simplicity of man is the gift and the confounding confoundment that they bring to us, just as our innate complexity levies the same effect on them.

For men, often a duck is just a duck. To us, we see a potential Christmas dinner (sorry to my vegetarian readers) and a down pillow, and wonder why in the world they only see a duck.   I think part of the problem stems from the idea that most women, including myself for large portion of my life, never really examined what is truly important to me in a relationship. What do I want from a man mentally, emotionally, spiritually,  physically,  sexually, financially, and how do I want to feel in his presence?   So many of us just take what we are offered, afraid
to have nothing offered at all. But for those of us who assumed a masculine role and do the doing, not only will you never have what you desire from a man, but you will also emasculate the man that you are in relationship with and he will never have what he wants from a woman, which in part is to be able to offer himself to her, not to be forced to give her what she wants.
There is a huge difference between being offered something by a man and asking for it from him.
In my book, I write about the difference between being a W.O.M.A.N.  And feminism. I believe that feminism attempted to bring socioeconomic parity two women,  which we certainly deserve, but somewhere along the way we stopped being in our feminine qualities.  We stopped experiencing them in ourselves and we stopped offering them to the world, and of course the men we come in contact with.

Men are longing to experience a part of us that knows how to just be, how to subtly suggest what we need from them, without so much blah, blah, blah. Men don’t want to be talked at, they want to be talked to.
But back to us. If you’re in a relationship, think about how the scenarios I am putting forth in this piece may relate to you and how your relationship began.  If your guy is someone who you complain about who is always sitting on the couch drinking beer, watching sports and porn, well, he should probably be in a relationship with a woman who likes to do those things as well. But if in beginning you chose to overlook qualities that were clearly present in him to go along with it to try to sway him into doing all the things you love, this relationship is and was doomed from the beginning.   The feminine art of asking from the place of the heart, the womb, is wordless and has more power than all the talking we could ever do.

A large part of my work speaks to the need for us to return to the true feminine essence, and by implication how that will redirect the masculine. The masculine has become more feminine as the feminine has become more masculine. Look around the world just in your immediate environment and notice how many couples have an inversion of those male/female polarities, where the women wear the pants so to speak.   And I’m not saying AT ALL that we should let men dominate us. That’s NOT what this is about.  It’s about balance, polarity, harmony, synergy, and most of all, love.  Not dominion.

So if you just show up as who you are and don’t feel that you have to effort, or do anything at all in order to receive, eventually the right guy will show up. He will offer you those things that are most important to you. You won’t get everything in one person but if you hold out and value yourself, you will attract the most important things on your list.
Now speaking of  lists, I highly recommend this as a practice that I have used in my life repeatedly to continue to attract the type of relationship I desire.  You do need to make those lists, as they will bring you copious amounts of clarity about all kinds of things you want and don’t want in a relationship. You must get in touch with what you desire and deserve and then you can call it in

So go back a few paragraphs — I know this is a really long post, LOL — but go back a few paragraphs and take some time to write down the answers to those questions. And I don’t mean five minutes, I mean take a week.  Write the answers down one day at a time.  Refine them, delete some, change them.   Until you are clear about what you truly want, you are gambling with the Universe, which will give you whatever you are asking for, consciously or unconsciously.  So become clear and create consciously, as you are otherwise creating unconsciously.   In the meantime you need to show up with the fervent belief and knowledge that you deserve just because you’re you. Stop trying to tell your man who to be or what to do and how to do it. Let him be.  And don’t use your love and affection as leverage or reward.  Love is given freely, or it isn’t love.

If he is truly not a match for you, do the right thing and let both of you out of the relationship. And the next time you meet a guy, if you are a food and wine aficionado and he’s asking you what you like to do and you tell him and then he never takes you to a winery or a great gourmet restaurant, then you know what to do. I’m cracking myself up that I keep picking the food analogies because anyone who knows me personally knows  food is not on my list!
So learn to surrender, it’s the most beautiful aspect of our feminine nature. Not surrendering for someone to have dominion over us, but surrendering to the power within us that has the power to attract all that we could ever need or want.

And yes, a duck is just a duck AND Christmas dinner (apologies again) and a feather pillow.  All potential is there.  What we or someone else sees doesn’t limit or define that duck.  Gina is just Gina.  AND  mother and a lover and a writer and a women’s health advocate.  If someone only sees some parts of me doesn’t mean the others don’t exist.  Bu I have to ask myself which on that list matter most for me to share with a man in my life.  If I choose a man who doesn’t see those parts that matter most, he’s probably not right for me.  Or if he realizes it matters to me and OF HIS OWN VOLITION AND NOT MY FORCING, decides to embrace or explore that with me, it can work.  That’s called growth in a relationship.

If you are a more masculine woman, you will attract a more feminine man.  Polarity is what creates chemistry in a relationship.  People without chemistry are just friends.  So examine your life, are the men you attract more feminine or more masculine?  What do you want?  And the more masculine a man is, the less likely he will love the wordiness that we women are so prone to, but he will give you other yummy things that we long for.  Most of us have a combination of masculine and feminine, with one usually dominant.
Which are you and why?

So I think I’ll leave you hanging there, to ponder yourself and all of the above.  If you chose to have a glass of wine or that shot of tequila before sitting down to read this, it may have turned into more than one, so I apologize if you’re now a little tipsy.

Remember, YOU are exquisite and deserve all that you desire.  Believe this with all your heart, go into your feminine essence, and allow it all to come to you.

Love & blessings,


PS. If you need help in unraveling this part of yourself, it’s one of the things I do best, so feel free to contact me here or at

Sisterhood – Getting High Off Of Our Connections With Other Women

The other day I was working out at my gym just doing my usual cardio routine when I was fortunate enough to have an accidental connection with a woman who got onto the elliptical next to me. She had accidentally clunked one of the rollers off of the groove and was trying to figure out what happened and in a collective problem solving moment, we figured out what was wrong.  She said thank you, and we started to chat. First it was politics, then the awful new decor at the gym.  And then, as almost any conversation I am  having with a stranger goes, it turned to just life. We opened up to each other about spiritual things, political beliefs, challenged childhoods and how they affect your life, and we just began to have this very animated, connected, instantaneous bond. We literally talked for an hour.    When we both got off of the equipment and were lying on the floor doing some abdominals, she looked at me and said, “God you can get high off of people!” And I smiled, because this made me realize how much I do love connecting with other human beings, but then I said to her,  “You know. this is really a woman thing.”    I said I had lots of men friends that I have great conversations with, but this kind of bonding, sisterhood, truly exposed kind of connection only happens between women, women who are willing to share and to open to each other.

I realized when she said that we can get high off people, that I did feel very alive in that moment from the connection we had forged over the past hour of bonding while working out.  We had also been talking about how devoid of female energy our world is and how it’s becoming more and more masculine in its pace, energy, frequency and ideas.  So of course that’s venturing into my very favorite topic, which just made us even more animated in our dialogue .  I love it when I can engage with another woman or women on the topic of why the world needs women to be women, not men.  It inspires me to talk about it and inspires the women I’m talking to.  That’s when we get high off each other!  When women find an inspiring topic, something that we feel passionate about and we share it with other women, especially with the intention to be of service, we can truly heal each other I believe, and change the world!  When we ban together for a cause, women are UNSTOPPABLE!

We even had discussion at one point in our mutual disgust at “how things are,” (read my post about the way things are!) and she expressed her feeling of “What can I do?  It’s hard to make a difference.”  There was such inspiration going back and forth between each other.  I truly believe there were endorphins being generated in our exchange, which is why she made the comment about getting high off of people.

All it takes is being open and willing and real and authentic.   All it takes is putting down your phone and looking into the eyes of a fellow woman, smiling and saying hello.  All it takes is a genuine caring connection with another human being. It is effortless. But we as women do this in a way that men don’t. And we do it with each other in such a beautiful way.  I live in Los Angeles and there a lot of fake “I love you people, let’s get together, ” seeming caring, that is just superficial. I’m not talking about any of that, and we all know the difference. This woman and I had genuine connection that we both availed ourselves of, shared with each other and because of this, we inspired each other, and literally got high off of connecting.

As women, we are such communal creatures. But this world that we live in, this ultra masculine frequency, energy, and pace, does not allow us to remember this, to experience this, to explore it, without being extremely conscious of the fact that it is nowhere to be found and if we want to experience it, we must generate it ourselves.  How? Just the way it happens organically, speaking to a woman that is next to you. Not sizing her up for her appearance or her attire or comparing yourself to her, but opening to the genuine sisterhood that is all around us, available to us, if we would only open ourselves to it.  It is truly easy to start a conversation about almost anything. And one thing does lead to another with us women. And quickly. LOL If I see a woman who is sad, or looks like they’ve had a bad day. I might compliment her on something, or I might honestly say something like, “Has your day been that bad?” It opens up a genuine door of compassion and connection that we can choose to step through with each other, and if nothing else, you’ve simply done a kindness by acknowledging that woman.  And ladies, we all know that acknowledgment is something we just don’t get enough of in our lives.

We are powerful, beauty-filled forces of feminine nature, and when we ban together to share ANYTHING, we open the door to EVERYTHING.  Talk to as many women in your day as you can.  Smile at those you can’t speak to, and offer your heart to your sisters through your words and smiles.  I have made so many wonderful women friends just by living my life this way.  We are all yearning to feel the feminine all around us, enfolding us, embracing us, sustaining us.  We long for it because it’s been almost completely removed from our world.  But where two or three, or more women gather in their feminine energy, there is an exponential increase in that energy in our world.  One by one, joining hands and hearts with our sisters, we can heal this planet.  This, I believe with all my heart.

So try it.  See where it leads you.  And take the time DAILY to tune into your feminine self.  Without constant access to this part of yourself, your life will be joyless, stressful and empty eventually. Women can’t live in a masculine world devoid of the feminine.   And if you need reminders, read my book.  It’s a quick read, but it will inspire you in your feminine essence.

For those of you in Los Angeles, I am starting a dance class focused on my acronym. W.O.M.A.N.  It will be a 5-week series, 2 hours a week, both lecture and dance so that you can experience the W.ild, O.pen, M.agical A.uthentically-empowered N.ectar you are.  Please contact me if you’re interested and I will put you on the mailing list for the class!  You’ll meet amazing women and unearth the Goddess lying within. We are exquisite!

Love and Blessings,

Gina Cloud


There are six words that make my blood boil whenever I hear them.  Those six words are: “That’s just the way it is.”  Those words signify to me resignation, acceptance, powerlessness over the way things are in our society, our world, our personal lives.  They reek of a militant, “march, march, march,” chant, inciting us to all be the same, to get in line and do as we are told by “them.”  Those six words ooze the frequency of “I can’t change it, so I have to accept it,” about circumstances that control our lives or make us feel hostage to them.  Those six words are prelude to a feeling of imprisonment and victimhood.  And they become an excuse for why we don’t take action in our lives to make things the way we want them to be, rather than the way they are currently, collectively.  They become the excuse for why we are not living true to ourselves.

What I want to know is who says that’s just the way it is, is the way it has to be?  In my world, those six words are a call to action, a call to rebellion, a call, literally,  to friends to vent about how angry it makes me that we just tend to settle for and accept what’s put before us in society as the norm, what’s popular, what’s happening du jour.  And almost always they are a call for me to move in the direction 180 degrees of whatever that thing is.

Let’s take the example of the media and its effect/control over our lives here in the West, and literally all over the world, but we’ve got it the worst here, I believe.  We absorb what’s put before us as the way it is, but why don’t we question it and ask that question:  who says it has to be that way?  If we stop and ask ourselves this question every step of the way, we become more independent, free-thinking people (yes, subversive to those who want us to stay in THEIR box), people who make choices based on having considered what’s right for you personally, for your family, for your health.  There’s almost no area of our lives that the media doesn’t touch/manipulate with its multi-armed monsters.  There’s TV, Internet, music, ads, magazines, radio, mainstream health information, especially as it relates to women’s health and prescription drugs.  We are bombarded with signals via all our senses, inviting us to get on the train bound for the destination known as mediocrity.
So ask yourself, do you really want to live a life proscribed by the dictates of others, no matter what their form takes?  Do you daily stop and ask yourself if what you are about to purchase/do/experience is something you REALLY choose, or is it just part of life’s treadmill that you’ve become accustomed to?  How would your life look if you turned off all the input from the outside and simply LISTENED to the output from within?

We are marching through our lives like automatons, being fed a modicum of metaphoric “foods” to keep us from feeling starvation, but our souls are so malnourished for that which would bring us true joy, vitality, connection to ourselves and others, a sense of purpose and peace.  What lives inside you that is TRUE to who you are regardless of whether society, or your family, or your friends, or your boss, or the whole damned world would find it acceptable?  Where are you compromising self to sustain the facade of being accepted by others?

When we are willing to simply question things, hell, EVERYTHING, our lives become ours again.  We reclaim them and begin the journey back to self.  So the next time you hear those six words, challenge the idea that it’s being said about.  And if you hear yourself saying them, then challenge yourself.  The only way it has to be is the way YOU choose it to be.

love & blessings,

Gina Cloud


 JOY:  THE KEY TO WEIGHT LOSSDiets don’t work.  They don’t work because being overweight is not the problem.  Being overweight is a SYMPTOM of the problem.  The real problem is lack of happiness, discontent with our lives,  a lack of connection to our true selves; and in a nutshell, living a joyless life.

Here in the West, we treat symptoms.  We have a drug or a diet for every symptom, but few cures for the cause of the symptoms.  When we are willing to look deeper, to find what is causing these symptoms in ANY health issue, and then to treat the CAUSE, this is when true healing can take place.  Without pulling up the root, the weeds, like symptoms, simply reappear over and over and over, weakening the life force of the plant.  The extra weight on your body is a weed, not the root.   And even when we use natural alternatives, unless they are intended to uproot the cause, there can be no cure.

Our obsession with weight loss in this country is an epidemic.  We have weight loss pills, diets up the wazoo, new diet innovations from people; like the blood type diet,  Atkins, Paleo, and the list goes on and on and on and on and on.  I’ve noticed lately, too, that talk shows seem to be turning into weight loss shows.  Lose weight fast, is the common theme, and everyone with a few extra pounds is all over it.  Let me try this one, let me try that one.  For those of you who have tried any of these, have they worked for you?  I’m willing to gamble 100% that they haven’t.  You may have lost some weight while on them, but did it come back?  Of course it did.  Health, of which your weight is a part, is about lifestyle, commitment, discipline, and SELF LOVE.  This is where the lack of joy comes into play.

I was recently a guest on the Ricki Lake Show on the topic of body image and self-esteem.  There was a woman on the show who had lost a lot of weight (about 150 pounds!), but found herself unable to stop feeling like a fat person.  She said she was still identifying with being overweight.  We spoke a bit backstage and I asked her if she had dealt with the underlying cause of the weight, the root, which had been sexual abuse, and she said that she hadn’t.  So while she managed to get the weight off (through bypass surgery), the root of the body weight, the sexual abuse, was still unhealed.  The goal she thought would make her happy, didn’t.

So what are you carrying around as emotional weight that has literally become body weight?  And how long have you been carrying it?  Weeks, months, years, your whole life?  Joy is our birthright.  Look at children at play.  They know joy.  Listen to the sound of their laughter.  It’s pure, unadulterated joy and elevates anyone around to hear it.  Where in your life did your joy start to diminish?  Can you find it now, or is it a distant memory?  Is it a memory at all?

When you are willing to examine your life, all its pieces and parts, the people in it, your work life, home life, your sexuality, your relationship to your body, and to take off the rose-colored glasses, then you can begin to heal the joylessness that you inhabit, perhaps without awareness.  Perhaps these words are making you realize that you’ve had no relationship to joy for as long as you can remember, and maybe they will stir a longing in you to find out why.  Where in your life did you become unplugged, literally?

So if you are struggling with your weight, be it pounds, or a heavy heart/mind, seek to restore the joy in your life.  When you do, those pounds will come off, the heaviness in your heart/mind will lift and you will find the childlike laughter that is STILL within you.  It is never lost.

If you’re asking, but HOW do I do this, Gina?  Makes sense, but how?  The answer is the road less traveled.  The road that takes you directly into your healing, but probably more slowly than you want to go.  Pills don’t work,  whether natural or allopathic pharmaceuticals.  They are bandaids on deep, gaping wounds that left uncared for, will fester and become infected.  What have you been treating this way in your life?  You already know the answer.

So back to how.  My dad used to say, “where there’s a will, there’s a way.”  And it’ true.  Most people need help in this process, at least until they can find the courage and commitment to stay the course.  This is a big part of the work I do, mostly with women, is to help you heal so you can lose the weight, both physically and symbolically.  Get support, in some form.  Books tend to open the mind to ideas, but rarely give you the motivation to actually take the action required for the journey.  You can start by making a list of all the things/activities that have made you feel joyful in your life.  Go back as far as you can into your memories to make a thorough list.  Once you have the list, make a commitment to begin doing some of those things again.  This will bring more joy back into your present, but the past still requires healing.  For those of you who could find nothing to put on the list of things/activities that have brought you joy in your life, you are just more shut down from your heart and your joy, but I assure you, it’s there.

I love the work that I do and  love helping people reconnect with their true selves, with the joy that is your birthright.  If you’d like to work with me, it would be my honor to assist you.  You can contact me and see what I do at  Some people feel they can’t afford help, but how much have you already spent on the useless products or diets trying to mask the symptom of extra weight?  I find that people who are really ready to surrender to this journey find me to work with them.  I’m tough, but loving in my approach and my goal for women is to help you live a life of natural beauty, born from the inside out.  When you accomplish this, your body finds its natural weight, because you are in true alignment with your own life, and because of this, your life becomes joyful.

If working with someone doesn’t feel right to you, then find a way. All you have to do is commit to a life of joy and all the tools you need will literally appear.  But you have to TRULY commit.  Do it.  You are absolutely worth it.

Please free to contact me with questions, suggestions, comments.  The link above (or on the sidebar) will get you to me.

Love who you are.  You are truly magnificent.  And remember that beauty is not skin deep.  It’s soul deep and spirit fed. Live this way and joy will be your constant companion.

Love & blessings,


The Ricki Lake Show and Me

Hello to all of you who follow my work.  I appreciate your devotion and support.  It drives me onward, truly.  This is just a quick post to let you all know that I will be a guest on The Ricki Lake Show on Monday, September 10, 2012 at 3:00 on Fox, Channel 11 (on the West Coast at least.)  We taped in July and it will be her debut show after a hiatus of many years.  Ricki is a friend of mine and I have great respect for her, and much of what is close to her heart is also close to mine.  She endorsed my book, W.O.M.A.N.: A New Definition in 2009 and invited me to be an expert on the show for an episode speaking to body image and self-esteem.  It was a powerful episode and I hope you’ll tune in.  Go to The Ricki Lake Show website to see where you can view it on TV, and it can always be viewed on the internet at a time of your convenience.  Ricki is going to be bringing many woman-focused topics to her audience in a very authentic way and I’m looking forward to the journey with her, as a repeat guest.

The producers at the show  have also asked me to start a monthly Teen Meetup Group, and we will be starting in October.  I suggested that we alternate one month for girls and the next month for moms, so if you’re interested or know someone who might be(it’s free), look for it on the website and sign up when it is available.

And please, peruse my other posts here on the blog.  I think it’s good stuff, all from my heart and the rantings of my crazy mind. I think you’ll like it, too.  Enjoy! icon smile The Ricki Lake Show and Me


Love and Blessings,



Ladies, ask yourself the question am I projecting sexuality or femininity into my world? What’s the difference? It’s energy and intent and it’s a powerful attractor even if you’re clueless to its existence. It’s your vibration which brings EVERYTHING in your life right to your front door. It’s energy Fed Ex.

If you’re projecting (or vibrating to) sexuality, you’re in essence saying ” come do me.”  From this place you will attract men looking to get laid. So if you’re looking for an emotionally intimate relationship, you won’t find it with this energy as your bait, as this vibe will bring men who want you in a sexual way, plain and simple. Projecting from sexuality means DOING something to get attention, generally via your appearance, and a lack of belief in your inner wealth as a woman.  For the most part a projection of sexuality is shallow, acknowledging only one small part of your beauty, your gifts, your magnificent energy as a woman.  It’s the part the media and the  marketing world can’t live without, your sexiness, but it robs you of a deeper experience in your life when you pander to this idea that your true value resides here.  It’s like saying, my value as a woman is in my appearance and as a sex object.  The word object itself refers to something OUTSIDE of you.   And understand projecting sexuality has NOTHING to do with how you dress and more with how you express.  A man recently told me that when he was in Italy that the women there dress in these very short dresses and high heels, that here in Hollywood would make a woman be perceived as a hooker, but there, because of their internal energy, they are so beautiful and alluring.  That energy is femininity.

Femininity is an exquisite quality that ALL women possess.  Some feel it and dismiss it as weakness.  Some feel it and are afraid of its power. Some choose Feminism instead .  Some simply don’t feel it at all, because it makes them feel too vulnerable.  And I’m not surprised, because our modern world does not support the very things that would allow a woman to tap deeply into her feminine essence and to offer that to everyone she meets and engages.  Our world in all its masculine ways doesn’t create a space for women to feel SAFE enough to allow that vibration to flourish.  And we as women have slowly but surely abandoned what keeps us connected to our core.  Those of you who follow my work know that a key one is our menstrual cycle.  Disconnection from this alone is responsible for more women living like men and projecting only sexuality without connection to the depth of our feminine.

Femininity is pure power in its essence.  It’s magnetic.  It’s in our BEING as women, not our doing.  A woman projecting femininity can wear baggy overalls and no makeup and yet her radiance will be felt a mile away by both men and women, and she will be desired on MANY levels.  Sexuality is part of femininity.  But femininity is not necessarily part of sexuality. Why do I say this?  Because the projection of sexuality is truly about using our external appearance to create lust in an attempt to bring a man to you.  It creates an energy whereby in essence we allow ourselves to be used.  It is one-dimensional, whereas true femininity is endlessly dimensional.  It’s like seeing one piece of a puzzle, instead of the whole puzzle.  Just think about those Victoria’s Secret catalogues that men love to look at.  I don’t think they’re wondering what it would be like to get to know those women in a relationship.  They’re probably sitting by a tissue box and some lotion.  When men want you for the way you look or for the sexual energy you project, and ONLY for this, you will never feel seen, acknowledged or valued.  And you will feel insecure.  So why go out there projecting this energy in the first place?

If you are longing to be in a relationship but you are projecting sexuality when you go out into the world, your longing won’t be met.  The men that will “relate” to you will want sexual relationships because you are overtly offering this to them through your energetic expression.  And the energy driving our expression is more powerful than the expression itself.  Do you believe you have to seduce with your appearance and your body to get a man?  If you do, then you will attract a man who wants your body and is drawn to your appearance.  You will be projecting sexuality.  If you are projecting femininity, a man will want to relate to ALL of you, as your mystery as a woman will draw him into YOU, not just your body.   Your sexuality expressed THROUGH your feminine energy will take you both to places of pure ecstasy. This is the whole puzzle.

So ask yourself what you believe about your value, your worth as a woman and what will draw a man to you.  Is it YOU, your feminine essence, or is it your sexuality?  Take time to examine this question and to observe what you believe and feel as you move through the world.  And if you’re in a relationship already, these questions are still important.  Did you attract from sexual projection or from being in your feminine essence?  What have you manifested and is it working for you? And remember, projecting your feminine energy whether you are seeking relationship or not, will bring you into more harmony with YOURSELF, and that is truly most important.  So be deliberate and intentional in how you use your energy and what you choose to create in your life, and in your world as a W.O.M.A.N.

Just some things to ponder…let me know your thoughts..

Love and Blessings,


Want to explore more of your feminine energy?  Check out my book, W.O.M.A.N. -A New Definition.

Where’s your Wild W.O.M.A.N.? When was the last time you let her out?

20120822 215850 Wheres your Wild W.O.M.A.N.? When was the last time you let her out?

  I’ve promised to explore each of the letters in W.O.M.A.N, and so I want to begin with the “W,” wild.  When I speak of wild in all that I write, I am not speaking of the Girls Gone Wild, MTV version or the kind that emulates male promiscuity.  I speak of a primal wildness borne of the soul and rooted in our bodies.  It is a most crucial aspect of who we are as women, and sadly a place most never visit within themselves or share with another.  That other is the truly wild man (speaking as a heterosexual woman), and I’ll get to him a little bit later, but let’s focus on the Wild Woman for now.
As I often share from my life, I can speak about the Wild Woman from a place of deep personal knowing.  She is the creature that feeds and renews my soul, and always has been, even before I knew her name.  So often in my life people refer to me as a “creature,” and it always makes me smile, because it means that they can “see” that wildness in me, front and center.  There is a duality in us as women – a tenderness of heart and this wild creature.  We are socialized to love and treasure that heart, and burned at the stake when we celebrate the wildness.  As you read this, see if you can call up a memory, a time in your life that you felt truly free, alive and instinctual.  If you can, then you have known your Wild Woman.  But don’t despair if you haven’t.  She is and always has been with you.
Of late, I’ve found myself ruminating on past relationships and realized that I have almost always let my heart, and not my Wild Woman choose my partners.  With the exception of one man, who was truly wild, they were not.  What I also realized is that because my Wild Woman was not part of that decision making process, but such a huge part of who Gina is, she ultimately was the one who made me move on.  I had not integrated her in my relationships, but she was fully present in my aloneness.  And so after what was usually several years, she would whisper or yell loudly, depending on my level of disconnect from her at the time, that she was bored and unfulfilled and would ultimately lead me out of every relationship of which she had not been a part from the beginning.  And then I would languish with her for a very long time in my aloneness.  This is part of the duality of which I speak.  Somehow we end up needing to be alone to feed her, and she will not go hungry, let me tell you!!!!!!  But having known one wild man, I know there are more.
Some women are afraid of their Wild Woman.  Many women experience her for the first time in dancing or in their sexuality.  Since society has tended to label us as promiscuous for enjoying our bodies and our sexuality (or witches!), most women subscribe to that in large or small part, and just send her packing.  But she will not be silenced for long.  For some reason in my own life, she has always been the voice I hear most clearly, and is the reason I crave freedom beyond all else.  I was never a woman who daydreamed about a wedding, and in actuality saw marraige as a prison for women.  I feel my wildness in my very core, and would rather be alone than to be with a man who is not truly wild.
So what is true wildness versus the idea that wildness equals naked bodies acting crazy?  We have all seen nature programs on TV.  When you watch wild cats or wolves stalk, hunt and devour their prey, you don’t judge them or call them bad.  You recognize that this is nature; natural, wild and pure,.  That those animals are acting instinctually.  They don’t judge themselves or their actions.  They are simply free and true to what they are.  They live as their nature instructs them, through all of their senses.  They eat when hungry, sleep when moved to, have sex when it feels natural to.  They are naked and wild.  To live in harmony with our instincts and our senses, animated by our souls is what I speak of as wildness.
Does it make your heart race to see wild animals hunting one another?  Yes, but it is survival and it is part of being wild.
I love not knowing what I’m going to do next.  That might sound peculiar, but it’s the truth.  Living in total harmony with my Wild Woman means I don’t know what’s next.  I am a slave to the drives and hungers of my body most of the time, and what those are vary from day to day. Needless to say, being this way can scare people – men specifically.  My daughter also tells me that I scare her sometimes because I am unpredictible, though  not in a bad way.  What I have learned is that in honoring her, my Wild Woman, I can live, really live free.  Whenever I feel imprisioned in my life, it is because I have not fed and cared for Her.  And when I do, I am electric, fearless and attract-ive.
One of my favorite books is “Women Who Run With the Wolves,” by Clarissa Pinkola Estes.  It is filled with stories about the various aspects of our instinctual natures as women.  She speaks of the duality of woman in this way: “Anyone close to a wildish woman is in fact in the presence of two women; an outer being and an interior criatura(creature), one who lives in the topside world, one who lives in the world not so easily seeable.  The outer being lives by the light of day and is easily observed.  She is often pragmatic, acculturated, and very human.  The criatura, however often travels to the surfacee from far away, often appearing and then as quickly disappearing, yet always leaving behind a feeling: something surprising, original, and knowing.”
She is the part of you that is inspired and unpredictible.  She is the part that draws people to you in an inexplicable and compulsive way.  They don’t know what it is about you, but they can’t take their eyes off of you.  She is the part that makes you feel comfortable in your own skin, especially when you are naked.  If you feel at all afraid of this part of yourself, please don’t!!  You must simply remember that she is YOU.  You can begin to get to know her at any time.  How?  It’s really very simple, as she requires little to feel fed.  Sensuality is a very big part of the Wild Woman, as it is in the animal kingdom.  Pay attention to how you move through space, what you smell, what you see, how things taste and feel, what you hear, and what you sense.  That sixth sense is so present in animals, and it is in woman as well.  Simply begin to explore it.  I suggest picking one sense a day and zeroing in on it as much as you can throughout the day, until you can begin to integrate all of them at once.  Eat with your hands.  There is something very sensual and primal about using your hands to put food into the mouth – yours or someone else’s. Let your hair down!  Seriously, if you tend to wear it up or control it with clips and bands, let it be free.  Try to stay as close to your natural state of beauty as possible.  For example, I have very curly hair, thanks to my ancestral gumbo.  When I have occasionally decided to wear my hair straight, I’ve found that I can’t take it.  It makes me feel contained and restrained!  I end up washing it by day’s end to get back my curls.  They are how I was born and they are a part of my integral wildness.  Find yours!  This may sound cliched, but take off your clothes and walk around naked.  Love your body as a woman’s shape, and let go of self-judgment about that size and shape.  Find some music that is dripping in percussion and dance to it until you are dripping in sweat. Move your hips, move your hips, move your hips!!!  They are the seat of a woman’s soul.   There is nothing like drums to bring you to your wildness and your primal truth.  And make sounds from your throat, especially when you are having sex, but when you are dancing, too.  When your hips are moving, let the sound move from your throat and past your lips.  Hips and lips are intimately connected.  A woman’s whose hips are free, can also express herself freely verbally.  There is an esoteric connection between the throat and the vagina.  To open them both is to achieve ecstacy – and to share it with your partner.  Estes offers this in her book: “The way to maintain one’s connection to the wild is to ask yourself what is it that YOU want.  This is the sorting of the seed from the dirt.  One of the most important discriminations we can mke in this matter is the difference between things that beckon to us and things that call from our souls.”
There could not be a discussion about wildness in its true, primal sense, without sex being part of that.  To really express it, we must free ourselves in our sexual expression.  That means that we need to have a partner that respects and understands our sexualtiy.  If you are wild and free and he is not, then you will not be able to go where you would like to.  If your partner doesn’t respect your boundaries, or where you are  with your current sexual expression, it will not work.  Respect and trust in bed is primordial.  Be sure that you enforce your own boundaries, so that you can attempt to arrive at a place of no boundaries together.  Love and sex are unquestionably the best of all, as long as both lovers are free.  I really believe that love is a free spirit, and one must be free to embrace it, for the spirit of love dies in captivity.
And finally a few words about the Wild Man.  Not the promiscuous dog we all hear about.  Not the man addicted to pornography.  He is the Wild Woman’s mate, truly, and a very rare find.  I believe that men are looking for and long for him as much as we long to love and connect with our Wild Woman.  I just think they are lost and confused for the most part, as they are trapped in society’s imprisioning ideas of masculinity.  Here is what Clarissa Pinkola Estes says about the Wild Man: “We know that the creature, Wild Man, is seeking his own earthy woman.  Afeared or not, it is an act of deepest love to allow oneself to be stirred by the wildish soul of another.  In a world where humans are so afraid of “losing,” there are far too many protective walls against being dissolved in the numinosity of another human soul.  The mate for the wildish woman is the one who has a soulful tenacity and endurance, one who can send his own instinctual nature to peek under the tent of a woman’s soul-life and comprehend what he sees and hears there… so, the wildish task of the man is to find her true names, and not to misuse that knowledge to seize power over her, but rather to apprehend and comprehend the numinous substance from which she is made, to let it wash over him, amaze him, shock him, even spook him.  And to stay with it.  It will make her eyes shine.  It will make his eyes shine.”
We all know the expression that men are dogs.  Well, they are, but on a soul level, it’s a compliment.  Wild Man’s dog nature is his instinctual nature, that which allows him access to the Wild Woman.  Estes says, “It is the dog-self that learns to overcome superficial seductions and retain the most important knowings…the dog is one entire side of man’s dualistic nature.  He is the woods nature, the one who can track, who knows by sensing what is what”    (about Wild Woman.)
I’ve had these dreams lately about dogs.  I’m not much of a dreamer by night.  I think Carlos Casteneda would call me a stalker.  Usually I just crash.  My mind is so active by day, and so when I dream, I pay attention.  I’ve seen the dog nature of man in these dreams, and it’s not the colloquial slur.  They represented a deep love from the heart, a love that flows easily and long, forgives effortlessly and can fight to the death to protect you.  These are qualities that, to me, are very appealing in a man.
So find your Wild Woman.  Make regular dates with her.  Integrate her into the fullness of your life.  Let her scare you, but don’t walk away from her.   You can’t.  When we choose not to know Her, our lives fall apart and we lose touch with what it means to be a W.O.M.A.N.  Love her and let her love you.  She is pure, wild beauty.